Features of the upbringing of a 3-year-old child. How to Raise a Boy as a Real Man: Tips

At the age of 3-4 years, children are actively developing imaginative thinking, there is an interest in sculpting, drawing, designing and the like. When a baby is engaged in reproducing his vision of the world around him, he necessarily explains what he wants to portray. At this age, a sense of their own success is actively developing. When the baby completes the task, he will definitely show you and will be glad that he did it. He may get upset if something doesn't work out. At an earlier age, children are not particularly upset about failures, or they quickly forget about them. Now the baby is more sensitive, so he will try to do what he has planned in order to prevent a state of his own dissatisfaction. It is at 3-4 years old that children actively manifest a sense of pride in themselves. Against this background, a sense of rivalry develops. This is not difficult to notice, because the child talks about the fact that he became the first in the kindergarten for a certain type of activity or ahead of all peers in the game of "catch-up". The first lie Often, children begin to be proud not only of themselves, but also of their parents. Sometimes you can hear the phrases "My mom is the most beautiful" or "My dad is the strongest." At this age, feelings of inferiority can give rise to a desire to lie. If the child does not receive enough attention, then begins to lie that the parents are doing all his whims and the like. The main thing is to notice in time that the baby has begun to deceive, because in the future it will be much more difficult to fix this problem. The child's reaction becomes more personal, because the feeling of "I" is actively developing. If earlier the child could be shy, react, focusing on the expression on the parents' face, now everything is happening extremely sincerely. Those. the child may laugh at the situation when the expression on the face of mom or dad is extremely strict. If the baby was a year younger, he would have thought before expressing his emotions. The fact is that everything happens at a subconscious level, where only psychological development can control these processes. Now the baby has become more attentive and indifference to the world is gradually "dull". The child notices and distinguishes something, evaluates the environment and objects according to certain criteria. As mentioned above, the baby becomes more sensitive. If someone is asleep, then he will not release all the energy in the game, trying not to disturb the sleeping person. He can empathize if someone is sad, hurt. Notices upset, discontent, joy, fatigue, anger and other emotional manifestations and tries to help. The reaction spreads when watching movies and cartoons. If the beloved hero dies, then the baby may cry. Feelings of guilt Feelings of guilt are actively developing. If the baby accidentally smashed his mother's vase or spilled water, he does not expect a “soft” reaction from the parents. Previously, a child could, after an hour, forget that his parents scolded him and continue to live in accordance with his values. Now he can worry for a long time about the punishment, grief of his parents, change of mood due to his fault, etc. If the child does not agree with the punishment, then he may harbor a resentment and, "pouting", not talk to anyone or ignore possible contacts. The child can give his assessment of what is happening. If mom says that you cannot take dad's things, and she herself violates what has been said, then the baby can remind about her prohibition or make a “small” remark. What is good and what is bad? Distinguishes between good and bad without parental guidance. If dad broke something, then the baby will say that it is not good. Also, the baby expresses his opinion on the actions of his peers. If someone breaks or breaks something in kindergarten, then the child can appreciate it and express it to the perpetrators. At this age, the child is prone to jealousy. He may shut up and ignore the instructions of the teacher if it seems to him that he is being treated a little worse. The same is true in the family, on the street and in other settings. Can be offended if someone is unfair to him. The kid is able to intercede for a peer, especially this is often manifested in relation to the opposite sex. If something does not suit him, then the little one can get angry, do something on purpose wrong, expressing his dissatisfaction. Previously, the child was not ashamed of anything, because his mother was there. Now the baby can express his embarrassment by lowering his eyes, rubbing his palms or fingers. The baby also expresses his shyness by moving his foot on the ground. Shyness occurs most often when staying in an unfamiliar environment, addressing strangers, and embarrassing situations. First Fears Alertness develops as a sense of security is formed. The kid will not reach for dogs on the street, because the unknown reaction scares him a little. The child is wary of strangers, animals, new environments, sometimes parents who treat him too harshly. At this age, children have a lot of fears about the dark and scary characters in films and cartoons. In order not to "add fuel to the fire", it is recommended to abandon intimidation, otherwise it will negatively affect the psyche of the baby. Often, parents, in order to teach them, scare children with various fictitious creatures. For example, if you don’t eat, Baba Yaga will take you. You cannot scare children by rejecting it. For example, if you don’t go now, then my dad and I will give you to the gray wolf. It is from 2.5 to 4 years old that children actively learn such concepts as safety, harm, danger, benefit. Previously, a child could do something just because he likes it. Now he chooses more communication with peers. Now is a rather difficult period, so you need to actively explain to your child what is good, bad, useful, safe, dangerous, harmful, etc. When a baby is interested in such "things", then you need to help him in this. Interest will remain interest if parents do not join. The kid may know that the dog is able to bite, but still crawl to it to pet it. The child tries to put everything into practice, and your word will help get rid of many problems. At the age of 3-4 years, the child feels less dependent on mom and dad, so he can refuse their custody. This is quite normal, because the age crisis progresses at 3-4 years old. The kid may specifically refuse your offers, demonstrating his independence and personality. The child fulfills requests that have been entrusted to loved ones. This factor is influenced by temperament, so requests can be fulfilled depending on the upbringing. The child is actively developing speech, so he likes to memorize new words, demonstrate his skills, try to make new friends, and gain experience from other children. It is often multiplied to notice a picture when one child has a sand tower, and the second sits and cannot understand why he does not work out. Then the second child will ask the first how he did it. Quid pro quo develops. You can ask the child to bring plates, and he will give you "and then I will watch cartoons longer" or something like that. If the child was helped, then he can perform the service of that person, as a token of gratitude. The child becomes more and more aware of the difference between the past and the future. He will not demand an immediate visit to the zoo, if it is possible only with his dad, who will be free in a few days. Often, children begin to wonder what will happen next in their lives. Persistence is actively developing, so the child can demand a new toy from the parents for a long time. Sometimes it can go down to entire scenes regarding the injustice of mom and dad. If parents pay attention to the baby, namely his upbringing, then the child becomes less hot-tempered. Despite the crisis of 3 years, it is possible to reduce the emotional reactions of the child. The main thing is to show the child what can and cannot be done. You need to gain authority in the eyes of the crumbs, then he will be obedient. You need to show severity, perseverance, but at the same time combine with understanding. When a child sees that he is appreciated and cared for, he often listens to his parents.

Yesterday your baby was so gentle and obedient, but today he is throwing tantrums, is rude on any occasion, and categorically refuses to fulfill his mother's requests. What happened to him? Most likely, the child entered the so-called crisis of three years. Agree, it sounds impressive. But how should adults react to such childish behavior and what to do for parents tired of whims?

In the psychological literature, a three-year-old crisis is called a special, relatively short life period of a child, which is characterized by significant changes in his mental development. The crisis does not necessarily occur on the third birthday, the average age of onset is from 2.5 to 3.5 years.

"I do not want! I won't! Do not! I myself! "

  • The period of stubbornness begins at about 1.5 years.
  • As a rule, this phase ends by 3.5-4 years.
  • The peak of stubbornness occurs at 2.5-3 years.
  • Boys are more stubborn than girls.
  • Girls are naughty more often than boys.
  • During the crisis period, attacks of stubbornness and moodiness occur in children 5 times a day. Some have up to 19 times.

A crisis is a restructuring of a child, his growing up.

The duration and severity of manifestations of emotional reactions largely depend on the temperament of the child, the family style of upbringing, and the characteristics of the relationship between mother and baby. Psychologists are sure that the more authoritarian relatives behave, the brighter and sharper the crisis becomes. By the way, it can increase with the beginning of the visit.

If recently parents did not understand how to teach children to be independent, now there is too much of it. Phrases "I myself", "I want / I do not want" are heard regularly.

The child is aware of himself as a separate person, with his own desires and needs. This is the most important neoplasm of this age crisis. Thus, such a difficult period is characterized not only by conflicts with mother and father, but also by the emergence of a new quality - self-awareness.

And yet, despite the apparent adulthood, the baby does not understand how to get recognition and approval from parents. Adults continue to treat the child as if he were small and unintelligent, but for him he is already independent and big. And such injustice makes him rebel.

7 main signs of a crisis

In addition to striving for independence, the three-year crisis has other characteristic symptoms, thanks to which it cannot be confused with bad behavior and child harm.

1. Negativism

Negativism forces the baby to oppose not only his mother's, but also his own desire. For example, parents offer to go to the zoo, but the baby categorically refuses, although he himself really wants to see the animals. The point is that the proposals come from adults.

Disobedience and negative reactions should be distinguished. Disobedient children act according to their desires, which often go against the desires of their parents. By the way, negativism is often selective: the child does not fulfill the requests of an individual person, most often of a mother, and behaves with the rest as before.

Advice:

You should not speak to children in a commanding tone. If your child has a negative attitude towards you, give him the opportunity to calm down and move away from excessive emotions. Sometimes requests, on the contrary, help: "Don't get dressed, we're not going anywhere today.".

2. Stubbornness

Stubbornness is often confused with persistence. However, persistence is a useful strong-willed quality that allows the little man to achieve the goal, despite the difficulties. For example, to finish building a house of cubes, even if it is falling apart.

Stubbornness is distinguished by the desire of the kid to stand his ground to the end only because he has already demanded it once. Let's say you invited your son to dinner, but he refuses. You start convincing, and he replies: "I have already said that I will not eat, so I will not".

Advice:

Do not try to convince the crumb, because you will deprive him of the chance to get out of the predicament with dignity. A possible way out is to say that you leave food on the table, and he can eat when he gets hungry. This method is best used only during a crisis.

3. Despotism

Most often, this symptom occurs in families with a single baby. He tries to get his mother and father to do as he wants. For example, a daughter requires her mother to be with her all the time. If there are several children in the family, then despotic reactions manifest themselves as jealousy: the baby screams, stomps, pushes, and takes toys from his brother or sister.

Advice:

Don't be manipulated. And at the same time, try to pay more attention to the children. They must realize that parental attention can be attracted without scandals and tantrums. Attract the baby to household chores - cook dinner for dad together.

4. The symptom of depreciation

For the child, the value of old attachments disappears - to people, favorite dolls and cars, books, rules of behavior. Suddenly he begins to break toys, tore up books, call names or grimace in front of his grandmother, utter rudeness. Moreover, the baby's lexicon is constantly expanding, replenishing, among other things, with various bad and even indecent words.

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Advice:

Try to distract children with other toys. Instead of cars, take up the constructor, instead of books, choose drawing. Often look at pictures on the topic: how to behave with other people. Just do not read lectures, it is better to play the child's disturbing reactions in role-playing games.

5. Obstinacy

This unpleasant symptom of a crisis is impersonal. If negativism concerns a specific adult, then obstinacy is aimed at the usual way of life, at all the actions and objects that relatives offer to the child. Often she meets in families in which there are disagreements on the issue of upbringing between mom and dad, parents, etc. The kid simply stops fulfilling any requirements.

Advice:

If the baby does not want to clean the toys right now, take him on other activities - for example, draw. And after a few minutes, you will find that he himself will begin to put cars in the basket, without your reminder.

6. Riot

A three-year-old is trying to prove to adults that his desires are as valuable as their own. Because of this, he goes into conflict over any reason. It seems that the kid is in a state of undeclared "war" with others, protesting against their every decision: "I do not want and I will not!".

Advice:

Try to remain calm, friendly, and listen to children's opinions. However, insist on your decision when it comes to child safety: "You can't play with a ball on the road!"

7. Self-will

Self-will is manifested in the fact that children strive for independence, and regardless of the specific situation and their own capabilities. The child wants to independently buy any product in the store, pay at the checkout, cross the road without holding his grandmother's hand. It is not surprising that such desires do not cause much delight in adults.

Advice:

Allow your baby to do what he wants to do. If he does what he wants, he will receive invaluable experience, if he fails, he will do it next time. Of course, this only applies to situations that are absolutely safe for children.

Video consultation: Crisis 3 Years, 8 manifestations of the crisis. What parents need to know

What should parents do?

First of all, adults need to understand that children's behavior is not bad inheritance or harmful nature. Your child is already big and wants to become independent. It's time to build a new relationship with him.

  1. React in a balanced and calm manner. It should be remembered that the baby, by his actions, tests the parental nerves for strength and looks for weak points that can be pressed. Also, you should not shout, break down on children, and even more so physically punish - harsh methods can aggravate and prolong the course of the crisis ().
  2. Set reasonable limits. There is no need to hammer the life of a little person with all kinds of prohibitions. However, you should not go to the other extreme, otherwise, due to permissiveness, you risk raising a tyrant. Find the "golden mean" - reasonable boundaries, beyond which it is categorically impossible to overstep. For example, it is forbidden to play on the road, to walk in cold weather without a headdress, to skip the daytime sleep.
  3. Encourage self-reliance. Anything that does not pose a danger to a child's life, a child can try to do, even if in the process of learning a few mugs break (). Does your baby want to paint on wallpaper? Attach a drawing paper to the wall and give some markers. Shows a genuine interest in your washing machine? A small basin of warm water and doll clothes will distract you from tricks and whims for a long time.
  4. Give the right to choose. Parental wisdom suggests giving even a three-year-old toddler the choice of at least two options. For example, do not force outer clothing on him, but offer to go outside in a green or red jacket :). Of course, you still make serious decisions, but you can give in on unprincipled things.

How to deal with whims and tantrums?

In most cases, the bad behavior of three-year-olds - whims and hysterical reactions - is aimed at attracting parental attention and getting the desired thing. How should a mother behave during a three-year crisis to avoid constant tantrums?

  1. During an emotional outburst, it is useless to explain something to the baby. It is worth waiting until he calms down. If you find yourself hysterical in a public place, try to divert the attention away from the "public" and divert the child's attention. Remember what kind of cat you saw in the yard, how many sparrows were sitting on a branch in front of the house.
  2. Try to smooth out outbursts of anger with the help of the game. The daughter does not want to eat - sit next to the doll, let the girl feed her. However, soon the toy will get tired of eating alone, so one spoon for the doll, and the second for the baby (watch the video at the end of the article).
  3. To prevent whims and tantrums during a crisis, learn to negotiate with children before starting any action. For example, before going shopping, agree on the impossibility of purchasing an expensive toy. Try to explain why you can't buy this typewriter. And be sure to ask what the baby would like to receive in return, offer your own version of entertainment.

To minimize the manifestation of tantrums and whims, necessary:

  • stay calm without showing irritation;
  • provide the child with attention and care;
  • offer the kid himself to choose a way to solve the problem ( "What would you do if you were me?");
  • find out the reason for this behavior;
  • postpone the conversation until the end of the scandal.

Some parents, after reading our article, will say that they have not observed such negative manifestations in their three-year-old children. Indeed, sometimes a crisis of three years proceeds without obvious symptoms. However, the main thing in this period is not how it passes, but what it can lead to. A sure sign of the normal development of a child's personality at this age stage is the emergence of such psychological qualities as perseverance, will and self-confidence.

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A man is usually offered to raise a son in a proverb; "Build a house, plant a tree and raise a son." However, not always men take or can take part in the upbringing of a boy, especially when he is 2, 3, 4, 5 years old. Psychologists say that the upbringing of future men is initially dealt with by mothers who spend all their time with their children in the first years of their lives.

Every mother wants to bring up a healthy, happy and successful person. But since the approaches to raising boys and girls are different, then we have to consider separately how mothers should develop their babies, depending on their gender.

Boys and girls are future men and women. Real representatives of the same gender are not born, but become. How to educate, what to develop in a boy, so that in the future he will become a real support for his parents and future family, the website of psychological assistance will tell you.

How to raise a boy without a father?

The erroneous opinion is the statement that only a father can raise a real man. In reality, the quality of upbringing is important, not who is involved in it. Single mothers do not always raise sons and daughters. However, alcoholic fathers, tyrants, parasites, etc., have a rather detrimental effect on boys. Psychologists do not see the relationship of what gender a parent should be in order to raise a son as a real man. However, the importance of approaches in education is noted.

Not every woman can guarantee the unborn child that his father will stay with them. There are frequent cases when future fathers leave women, leaving them in an interesting position. How, then, to raise a boy to be a real man? Naturally, before the eyes of the son there should be a living example of a man, whom he will look up to. If that example is not the father, then he must be found. It can be a neighbor, grandfather, friend, another man, etc. If a son and another man establish good connections with each other, then the boy will try to be like him.

You can send your son to the "male" section or to a place where there will be many men. It also compensates for the lack of a father.

  • Do not try to replace the father who is not with the son. Better from childhood educate him independence. If he doesn't succeed the first time, let him try again after analyzing the errors.
  • Do not scold, do not lisp, do not encourage the boy's whims. Do not treat him like a pathetic creature who has been deprived of paternal attention.
  • The son should be praised in the same words that apply to men (protector, breadwinner, etc.).
  • You should put yourself in the role of a "weak woman" so that the son fulfills roles and responsibilities where he shows strength (like a real man).

How to raise a boy correctly?

From birth, future men develop qualities that they will then use in adulthood. It depends on the parents (or parent) what these qualities will be and how "courageous" they will be.

To properly raise a boy, psychologists recommend:

  1. Give some freedom to my little son. He must feel the space of choice and gradually understand that his actions are followed by consequences, for which he is also responsible.
  2. Give your son the freedom to choose. Let him make decisions on some important issues.
  3. Give your son both affection and coldness. Usually boys are raised in harsh conditions where they should not cry and give in to emotions. However, this often leads to deviations in behavior and character, which are characteristic of unhealthy individuals. In the future, someone begins to abuse alcohol, someone dabbles in drugs, someone turns into a gigolo, etc. All forms of an unhealthy personality are a consequence of the fact that boys were not allowed to experience and show emotions, as girls are allowed. But emotions are a natural reaction of the psyche, which must express itself.

How to raise a 2-year-old boy?

Two years of age is considered the period when children are already beginning to understand that they are different from toddlers of the opposite sex. Boys realize that they are somewhat different from girls, so their upbringing begins to change from the age of two.

  • First, the baby should not be beaten or severely punished, as this can cause distrust of the world and a feeling of dislike for oneself.
  • Secondly, the baby begins to improve his physical skills. The boy should not be forbidden to jump and run, filling with bumps and bruises.
  • Third, do not punish your son for taking the initiative. Children already little by little want to do adult tasks, helping their parents around the house. Encourage their desire so as not to grow out of them inept.
  • Fourth, set limits. Gradually, the child should be taught to the word "no", showing that some words and actions are prohibited, and unpleasant consequences may follow.
  • Fifth, allow your child to develop at their own pace. If he is somehow different from other boys, this does not mean that you need to sound the alarm or compare him with them. Allow your little one to grow up to the point where they learn something.

The main activity of the son is play. It is in a playful way that you show him the world, teach the skills and rules that are inherent in his gender.

How to raise a 3 year old boy?

The age of three is already marked by a greater understanding of the child about who he is. To raise a future man, you need to tell your son that he is a boy and that is good. Let him value himself as a man. Praise him as a boy, as a representative of the stronger sex: "You are brave ... You are strong ... You are brave ...".

For a three-year-old son, a father becomes important (or a man who personifies a representative of his gender). Since the son is a man, he must learn to be a man from a member of that gender. That is why fathers should take an active part in the life of their sons from the age of three, so that otherwise the boy does not reach out and look up to his mother.

At this age, the son should be given free space. It can be either a corner in a room where only the baby commands everything, or space in movements, choice. The son must gradually acquire his own territory in every sense of the word.

Parents should be comfortable with the following things:

  • The child begins to say "I myself." Gradually, the separation of the son from the mother begins. This should be encouraged as the boy begins to become an independent person. He should be helped with this.
  • The child is somewhat different from other children. If the son is hyperactive, speaks little or learns poorly, he should not be punished for this. Love him for who he is and help him adjust his skills or character.

How to raise a 4 year old boy?

Despite the fact that the boy has reached the age of 4 and is trying to be independent, he continues to be a child who needs the love of his parents.

Therefore, the first thing adults need to do is love their son.

  1. Punishing is no more than praising. Otherwise, low self-esteem or aggressive behavior may develop.
  2. Allow your baby to show emotion. He is still a child who vividly experiences all inner experiences. They should be allowed to manifest, even though men are not crying. ”
  3. Expand the baby's free space. Let his circle of responsibilities grow, as well as his circle of entertainment.
  4. Continue to develop a positive attitude towards the gender of the baby. This should be done in such a way that there is no disdain for the opposite sex. Both sexes are important and the child should be taught this.

How to raise a 5 year old boy?

The age of five is the final period when a boy begins to understand who a man is. He increasingly begins to copy the habits of men, lovingly treating girls. It is especially interesting that the son begins to relate to his own mother, whom he begins to love and even wants to marry.

At this age, you should continue to develop masculine qualities in the baby. This is done by increasing free space, assigning more and more responsibilities, allowing you to do more and more things, independently make decisions on more and more issues. Toys should be "masculine", it is desirable to play with them for the father or friends of the baby.

The boy will soon go to school, so he should be prepared for this period both intellectually and psychologically.

Already at this age, boys can begin to tell how to treat girls, what relationships to build with them, how they differ from boys, etc.

How to Raise a Teenage Boy?

The most difficult period in the upbringing of a future man is adolescence. Previously, a cute baby no longer obeys his parents, whom he perceives as an obstacle to his happiness. Now he is more subordinate to the opinion of friends, and not mom and dad.

Gradually obedient, cheerful, lovely boys turn into aggressive, unfriendly rebels. However, we should not forget that even during adolescence, you should raise your children, making them future men.

In order not to face the problems that are often traced in families with teenagers, fathers should take an active part in upbringing. Mothers should recede into the background, since only an aggressive father, a representative of his gender, who will teach the real state of affairs, can cope with an aggressive boy.

Outcome

Raising a boy is not as easy as it seems. If at an early age boys are obedient, then in adolescence they become unruly. It is good if both parents are involved in the upbringing. However, the mother (or father) can also cope with the child on her own, if you do not forget about one thing - you are raising the future man, so treat him accordingly.

Mothers should remember that they are raising future men. This means that some manifestations should not be expressed in relation to sons. What is good in raising a girl may not be necessary in raising a boy. You should keep a picture of what kind of man you are raising in order to understand how to do this while he is small and malleable.

Psychology of parenting brought to the section of science in the 40s of the twentieth century. The purpose of this direction is to find solutions to the problems of educating children's personalities, their harmonious formation, the development of morality, etc. The psychology of parenting is the basis of educational psychology, which helps to solve and understand the problems of each child and to find an approach to the representative of the younger generation.

Psychology of parenting 2 years old

Raising children 2 years old is not such a simple matter as it seems at first glance. Difficulties associated with raising babies are repeatedly encountered by many parents. A baby who is two years old often gives parents a lot of trouble with their stubbornness ,. At this age, a baby can become a "difficult test" for its parents. The little tyrant often objects to an adult who is somewhat larger than him. The most difficult is for those parents who are sure that the baby must obey them in any case. Often, a 2-year-old baby shows his character, reacts with irritation, throws tantrums, rejects the help of adults, and parents often cannot understand what is happening to the baby.

A baby at the age of 2 years has a well-developed motor function and for him there are no places where he could reach. The little one already has a better command of his speech and thanks to his skills he tries to be “self-governing”. If adults understand that these are only his physical achievements, then it will be easier for them to show their tolerance than to assume that he wants to deliberately unbalance his parents.

The psychology of parenting under 3 years old - tips

The kid should be asked questions to which he can answer either "yes" or "no", while the adult should be willing to accept both of these options. For example, when it is necessary to leave the playground with the baby, you should tell him about it like this: "We leave in 5 minutes." After the expiration of the time - you should start taking action. It is necessary to say with confidence: "It's time to go", if the child resists, then it is required to persistently take him away.

You should give the baby the right to choose - for example, choose your own version of clothing from the two provided.

The psychology of parenting under 3 years of age includes flexibility in parenting. It is important to support any choice of the baby and teach him to take his choice responsibly. For example, if the baby is hungry, but refused to eat, then you should not categorically insist on eating at this very moment, you should just put the food aside. The kid will definitely return to the offered food. If adults adhere to these tips, then the difficult age of a two-year-old crumbs will pass unnoticed.

Psychology of parenting 3 years old

Each parent wants to educate their child correctly, so that it grows up as a full-fledged, healthy and creative person.

Raising a 3-year-old child requires a lot of attention and patience from adults. Over the next years of life, babies will develop basic character traits and form ideas about the foundations of behavior in adulthood. Often the behavior of a 3-year-old child is marked by moodiness and tantrums. In such situations, it is important for adults not to lose, patiently and calmly explain to the baby what they do not like in the behavior of the crumbs. It is recommended to sharpen the baby's attention, what exactly upset the adult. After that, it is necessary to divert attention with something interesting and not focus on this conflict.

The psychology of raising a 3-year-old child is aimed at eliminating unnecessary prohibitions and the manifestation of severity, otherwise in the future the baby will become unnecessarily demanding, capricious and fastidious. You can not beat and humiliate the baby, you should make him feel on an equal footing with adults.

A three-year-old baby begins to realize himself as a person, but due to the lack of life experience, the baby does not know how to show his independence, perseverance, activity in achieving the goal. In order for a child to develop harmoniously, it is necessary to fill his life with interesting activities, games, walks. The child should always be treated tactfully and fairly, and then the child, having matured, will repay with his love and respect.

Psychology of parenting 4 years old

Raising a 4-year-old child is difficult enough. At 4 years old, the baby is a separate person with his own desires, his own opinions and emotions.

The correct upbringing of a 4-year-old child will have an impact on all aspects of his future life, therefore, this issue must be approached very thoroughly. If in early childhood emotions and instincts mainly control the baby's life, then by the age of 4 his behavior becomes more conscious.

In order to choose the right direction in the upbringing of a 4-year-old child, one should consider the key points in the development of crumbs at this age.

The psychology of upbringing children of 4 years old needs changes due to the shift in emphasis from physical activity to mental activity (all kinds of creativity are of interest to the kid: modeling, drawing, making various crafts); this behavior must be encouraged, especially if the baby is not assiduous. At 4 years old, if health permits, it is recommended to send the baby to the sports section (swimming, gymnastics, and so on). We must not forget about daily walks, which are good for strengthening the immune system, and outdoor games develop gross motor skills. If the baby already knows the alphabet, then he should begin to teach him how to read. It is advisable to familiarize the baby with the basics of mathematics in a playful way.

At 4 years old, the emergence of curiosity and endless "why?", Which are able to unbalance any adult, is noted. The crumbs' questions should be answered directly and without unnecessary details. If an adult does not have the necessary information, then you should tell the baby about this and promise to find an answer in the near future.

If the child is already attending kindergarten and he has problems with adaptation in the team, then the adult should help him to overcome them. First, you need to determine the cause of this state (shyness, shyness, jealousy), and then teach the baby how to communicate with peers, share toys or, if necessary, stand up for himself. If you cannot solve this problem, and it becomes global, then it is better to seek help from a child psychologist.

Family psychology for raising children of 4 years old takes into account certain changes that the baby's psyche undergoes in the process of growing up. A child of 4 years old begins to experience new feelings for himself: irritation, resentment, shame, sadness. He is not able to cope with them on his own, he may not obey, behave badly. During this period, it is important to support the baby, explain that everyone is experiencing emotions - and this is normal. It is necessary to tell the child that it is better to express your feelings not with bad behavior, but with words. It is required to praise the baby, since the lack of praise is felt very sharply by the crumbs, and it is worth punishing strictly according to the case, so that it is clear for what. Praising a child follows for new achievements or for great efforts in any business. It is required to always tell your four-year-old about your love, even if the behavior is not happy.

Raising a child of 4 years old girl. As practice shows, it is easier to bring up a girl than a boy. This is due to a calmer and more obedient disposition inherent in purely female character traits. Girls prefer to play “mothers and daughters”, “hospital”, “shop”, “hairdressing salon”. While encouraging these games and behaviors, it is important to maintain confidence in your daughter's beauty and exclusivity. This will allow her to have adequate self-esteem in the future. The girl needs to instill a love of cleanliness, punctuality, femininity.

Raising a child 4 years old boy. Boys are inherently more active and often aggressive. At 4 years old, a boy should understand that girls cannot be offended and know why. A man from the family must necessarily be involved. It can be both dad and other male representatives of the family - uncle or grandfather. This makes a big difference. In addition, it is necessary to put in front of the boy as few prohibitions as possible, since an active child will still find an opportunity to overcome them.

The more adults spend time with the baby for games and various activities, the more curious, capable and quick-witted he will grow up.

Psychology of parenting 5 years old

At the age of 5, a child continues to learn both himself and other people - representatives of society. He begins to gradually realize that there are some connections in the relationships of people, as well as in their social behavior. In the behavior of 5-year-old children, one can find the formation of the rudiments of self-regulation. Toddlers begin to make demands on themselves that were previously imposed on them by adults. Five-year-old children are already able to complete the work they have begun, not to be distracted by interesting things, they are able to remove toys, and put things in order in the room.

The psychology of raising children 5 years old should include perseverance on the part of adults, since kids at this age begin to realize that there are generally accepted norms, rules of behavior, begin to understand their responsibility and obligation to comply with these norms and rules.

Emotionally, the baby is able to experience the assessment of his behavior given by others, he begins to understand how much he himself observes generally accepted norms and rules, whether it corresponds to moral and ethical ideas.

It is quite easy for a five-year-old to comply with the norms in interaction with people he likes, such as friends. With peers, a five-year-old kid is able to control his aggression, play and share toys, and immerse himself in educational games with interest.

The psychology of upbringing children of 5 years old reveals changes in the crumbs of self-image. The ratings and opinions of friends become important. At this age, the baby selectively approaches the choice of friends, with peers he is able to establish stable relationships. A child of 5 years old takes as friends those who have positive qualities or are successful in any business. You can often hear from a five-year-old child that his friend does not fight and that he is interested in playing with someone.

At the age of 5, there is not much difference in the upbringing of a girl or a boy. Of course, boys are more energetic and girls are assiduous, but the main points from parenting psychology are suitable for both genders. At 5 years old, the change in mood does not happen so violently, and the grown-up baby becomes much calmer. If you turn to him with a request, then he will adequately respond to the words and requests of adults. Adults should constantly explain to the child why something should not be done.

By brushing aside various children's "why?" The more often parents answer the baby's questions, the better for adults. Thus, the child will understand that it is possible to turn to his parents with his questions, and that means that in adolescence, when faced with problems, he will come to the parents for advice. So that the baby does not become withdrawn, you should constantly communicate with her. If an adult noticed that the baby wants to say something, then you can get ahead of him and ask him leading questions. If a child asks, you should always answer. In order for the upbringing to go right, it is necessary to pay enough attention to the crumbs.

Summing up, it should be noted that the psychology of raising a child should correspond to the age needs of the baby. The full development of a baby is possible subject to protection and a feeling of love. Otherwise, an adult runs the risk of facing the resistance and passivity of his child. Raising a child will have an effect if the child succeeds in any kind of activity. Having experienced such a moment, the educated person will feel a sense of satisfaction from their result and participation in activities. The educational process should not be open, otherwise the baby realizes that they are trying to influence him with moral teachings and will actively resist.

Raising a child 3-4 years old. In order not to grow a liar, to be ignored ... The difference of this age is the manifestation of independence ...

The first transitional age, character formation, self-awareness and the development of logical thinking are signs of a child who has crossed the 3-year line. A lot of provocative moments await the parents on the part of the baby. The formation of a personality largely depends on the reaction of adults to his behavior during this period.

As well as in children from 1 year old, knowledge of the world of 3-year-old kids occurs by the method of parsing things. Only when asked who did it, you can hear many versions that are completely untrue.

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In order not to grow a liar, these tricks cannot be ignored. It is necessary to explain that there will be no punishment, you just need to put everything in order. Provided that the item is no longer subject to repair, the child must throw it into the bucket on his own. Such measures can lead to tears, but they will make the master of lomaster pause.

The reaction of the parents may be different, but it is better, and physical punishment is generally meaningless. Such methods will lead to the fact that the child will feel resentful. His resentment can drag on for a very long time, it is easier to restrain his anger and desire to punish, and to find out what the child wanted to know by examining the next thing.

It is necessary to let the child understand that everything is possible for him, only his actions can leave the family without the necessary things. The next time he is going to learn something in a practical way, it is worth taking an adult as an ally, or simply asking how it works.

Most often, units are disassembled and broken, the purpose of which is not clear to the child. To make an object understandable and useful, teach your toddler how to use it. For electrical appliances, it is necessary to make a reservation that you can only use it when mom or dad is around.

Children remember very well if you show them how the music is turned on, or how to put the disc correctly in the video player and what buttons, in what order, you need to press. Because by repeating the actions of adults, he can make a mistake. Raising children from 3 to 4 years old is a help to assert themselves and. To consolidate the acquired knowledge, several times ask the child under supervision to turn on music or put on a disc with your favorite cartoon.

Whims and crying

Crying and whims of the first adolescent age no longer refer to the fact that the child has health problems or physiological needs. Tears at this age often appear from resentment and misunderstanding on the part of adults. Thus, the child makes it clear that he needs to be hugged, praised, and occupied with something new, cognitive.

No additional lessons will be required if the parents themselves adhere to certain rules of behavior in relation to the older generation, behavior at the table, in relations with each other.

You don't have to be a parenting guru to avoid mistakes. The main criteria for great parents are:

  • restraint in assessing actions;
  • desire to understand the reason;
  • personal example;
  • not a stereotyped approach;

The best way out of a predicament is a sense of humor. Having started laughing at something with the child, we can assume that half of the problem has already disappeared. It remains to explain what a rash act can lead to. Children have not yet formed psyche, so as not to provoke him to continue the experiments, one cannot talk about the worst. It should be limited to the fact that it will be very painful for him and not only he, but also mom and dad will cry.
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Practitioners and theorists

Children are divided into two main categories, some like to learn everything through contact with the material, others like to know the process in theory. You can often meet a child who prefers to watch educational programs, repeating words and numbers after the speaker. Others find it easier to count and learn words with direct contact with material, photographs, animals. The craving for one of the variants of cognition can be explained by various types of memory:

  • visual;
  • muscular;
  • photographic;

It is necessary to develop all kinds of memory. Visual memory develops when watching a video sequence. Muscle memory is not only responsible for certain skills in working with plasticine, pencils, and a screwdriver. By drawing a certain letter or number, the child remembers not only the drawing order, but also the symbol itself and its name. It is easier for practitioners to memorize animals in this way and learn to distinguish between them.

Children with well-developed photographic and visual memory will learn this in an easier way. It is enough for them to compare the pictures. To help a child develop all types of memory, it is worth working with him according to several methods. Be sure to pay attention to the lessons of modeling, drawing. View educational programs together in order to correct inaccuracies in the pronunciation of endings or numbers in time.

The problem with children who do not accurately reproduce sounds is not that they do not hear, they need to see articulation. They perfectly copy facial expressions, repeating words, try to copy the movement of the lips and the position of the tongue when reproducing the word - this will help many of the children avoid classes with a speech therapist.

Day rest

The psychology of raising a child from 3 to 4 years old is different, therefore the advice for each situation is different.

The main difference between this age is the manifestation of independence. Often children by the age of 4 do not need naps. But still, rest is necessary for small energy generators. This could be reading a book or cutting out paper. The main rest is an activity that does not allow excessive overexcitation and negative emotions.

Overworking children affects differently. Some begin to whimper about every minor matter. Others are vigorous, scattering toys and things. Still others begin to sort out pencils, felt-tip pens, buttons. The first two categories need help to calm down. It is better not to touch children from the third category, they will calm down on their own. Often they fall asleep anywhere, the main thing is that they always wake up in their bed.

Realizing that sleep is a need of their own body, and not a whim of adults, the child himself will go to rest at a certain time. Many mothers try to hold the baby in their arms, rock it. At 3 years of age, this leads to a reverse reaction.

For some children, it is enough to rest in the arms of their mother, others need sleep. Having calmed down, children often ask to let go. It is necessary to do so to avoid another dose of crying. Most likely, the child will ask for a crib or settle down on one of the sofas himself. If this did not happen, he will no longer cry.

It is more difficult to put a child to bed in the afternoon in the summer, but his fatigue is the higher, the more he is in the fresh air, and the more emotions he gets from new acquaintances or the impressions of discovering new places.